Break Ups, Relationships

Broken-Hearted Besties

Your phone buzzes with an incoming text from your bestie:

“Can you talk?”

Immediately your spidey senses are tingling, and after calling her, it’s confirmed.

She just broke up with her boyfriend.

While we’ve all been through break ups, supporting a broken hearted friend can leave us feeling more “Clueless” than Cher or Dion.

Here’s the scoop on 4 simple ways you can support your broken hearted bestie:

1) Space Jam

One of the first things we’re tempted to do, is to push our friend out of the house, and back into the “he’s cute,” “look-for-rebounds” zone.

Yet no other “him” will fix her pain.

That work belongs to her.

So go to whichever space is her jam.

Maybe it’s meeting her for tea, or crawling into bed with her to have a Nextflix binge session.

One of the best ways to support your bestie is simply holding space with her.

2) Ventathon

The expression “you have 2 ears, and 1 mouth” definitely articulates the importance of listening.

Is your bestie going to repeat the same stories, and flip flop between missing her ex, and ranting about him?

Most likely.

But save your judgments for court.

No need to try to cheer her up, bash her ex, or hijack her experience by telling her how much worse your last break up was.

Let her be.

Let her vent.

And let her know that she’s not alone in feeling that way.

3)  Love Reminders

Whether you write down 10 awesome things about her, and stick them all around her house (don’t forget to stick one on her bathroom mirror), bring her a break up package of goodies, or buy her the most laugh-worthy socks so she can’t help but smile when wearing them (see my resource of the week for one of my favs).

These serve as reminders that she still has tons of sources of love in her life.

4) Take Care of yourself

Wait, what?  I thought this post was about helping my broken hearted bestie?

While that is true, it’s also true that sometimes our besties can call us off the hook, explode our phone with texts, and be clingy in times of grief (heck can’t we all?)

That’s why setting boundaries on how often you respond via text, call, or in person meetings, is SUPER important.

After all, if you become a “drained” version of yourself, you won’t be of any help to your bestie.

 So keep yourself full and vibrant!

That way, you can show her light during her time of darkness.


As always, thanks for joining me this week and if there’s anything you find useful, please share with a friend.

If you’re not already signed up to get my weekly newsletters, my latest break up stories, tips, and inspiration, then fill out your info at the top and subscribe!

Now it’s your turn- head on over to the comments section and let me know how you support your bestie when she’s going through a break up.

Love,
~d

*oxo.

Resource of the week: These socks are definitely a “hoot,” and a fav of mine

https://www.yo-sox.com/collections/womens-knee-high-socks/products/cute-owl-womens-high-socks
Sox owls
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2 Comments

  • Reply Lidia at

    What a great article. I get pulled in & it is so draining. Thank you for this reminder.
    I am so happy you made your dreams come true 💕 and in doing so are helping people

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